How To Touch as Many Balls as Possible

I really don't know what to make of this guy... Sure, I'd like to get my hands on as many balls as possible... I mean, who wouldn't? But really, wearing two different hats to a game? If some dude sitting in front of me at the Jays-Yankees game tonight tries to pull that stunt he can surely expect a Delgado bath and a swift kick to the groin.

As for learning the different languages, we'll chalk it up to a gross missallocation of resources on this guy's part and suggest that somebody have a chat with him about his priorities (for all intents and purposes, this dude might as well have the word VIRGIN tattooed across his forehead). Because I can tell you that I've attempted this "learning a catchy phrase in the native tongue" approach with girls in foreign countries and I can say with complete certainty that 60% of the time it works every time...


The best explanation for this guy's success, however, comes from the YouTube comment section:

No self respecting adult brings a glove to a game. They must think this kid is retarded thats why they give him a ball.


Thanks to Flats for the tip.