Saturday, May 24, 2008

Skinny Jeans for Men



I know I'm a little late to the party on this one, but is it safe to say that the mainstream emergence of "skinny jeans for dudes" is the worst fashion trend of all time?

Don't get me wrong: I think skinny jeans have their place. They look fantastic on most girls, and they look well enough on gay men because gay men can pull it off and they generally get a free pass because they're trend setters and know a hell of a lot more about fashion than I ever will.

But on straight men? Maybe I'm missing something, but I just don't get it. First off, it looks absolutely horrific, and I can't imagine any girl; emo/indie-scenester/skater-punk or otherwise; finding that look sexually appealing in any way whatsover. Really, isn't finding out whether the dude is circumcised or not half the fun for girls? I can't imagine they want to know that information upon first glance while standing around waiting for Dashboard Confessional to take the stage.

Secondly, those pants can't be comfortable to wear. There was some dude walking in front of me today wearing those nut-huggers and he honestly looked like he was about three weeks overdue on his hip replacement surgery. I guess the good news is that those pants will almost certainly make their wearers sterile, meaning that we won't have to worry about these people ever reproducing. Natural selection at its finest.

And lastly, the skinny jeans thing isn't even cutting edge anymore. When Joey Ramone and Sid Vicious were doing it, at least they were giving a giant F-you to the establishment. And when people began re-wearing them again in 2006, at least they were somewhat ahead of the curve, abominable a curve though it may have been. But Sandra and I were walking along in the rain in Alphabet City last weekend, and she started singing that Rihanna song because I was standing under her umbrella, and some little punk walking in front of us was wearing those hideous skinny jeans and didn't think we could hear him as he said to his skinny-jeans-wearing-friends: "that's soooo original to be singing that song right now". To which I obviously responded: "I guess we'd be more original if we were wearing those jeans". That shut the little poser up immediately.



For the record, the only fashion trend I can imagine being worse for humanity would be if these ever made a comeback, or if this guy sat next to you at the beach.

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

hahaha
although we still got 8 months to go, that is definately a nominee for best comeback of 2008.

what a little emo nerd... you should google emo riots... In most of latin america, because they are so homophobic, there are Rocker / Emo clashes going on...

it's like mods vs. rockers revisited... and the rockers look the same now as in 1960, amazing!

-dvz

Anonymous said...

This is one of the best blogs yet. I love it!! And yes, it's hard wearing skinny jeans being a GIRL... why would you do it when you have an easy-out as a guy?

.... I would have tripped the guy who made that comment to Sandra.... let me at 'em!!

LMM

Kevin said...

seanny...how did you convince sneeze to pose for the picture?

fathobie said...

hahah darling skinny jeans are the bomb. What is wrong with you. yes of course skaters who wear their sisters jeans are going a bit overboard. but that photo of the guy at the festival. I look up to that guy, he looks heaps cool. Im sorry but i dont want to see evey guy wearing enormous jeans at festivals. And who cares if everyone is wearing them!!!! I wear them hahahaah. Its better then wearing jeans with running shoes...yuck!!!

Anonymous said...

You know there is skinny jeans for men that are way less tight that the one on the photo. Skates jeans for example are like between the super tight skinny and the straight leg.
And anyway skinny are not nutcrucker as you should wear them lower than normal jeans... (and you try to find a longer t-shirt) if you wear them like normal jeans sure you will look gay...

wynterblu said...

long live skinny jeans on dudes!!

Girlbird said...

I agree with the people above me - Skinny jeans on guys - provided you know how to wear them - are pretty sexy. Maybe it's just that most of the ones I've seen who wear skinny jeans are the indie rocker types, who are just sexy in general because they have good music taste and/or ability.

Seriously. I hate baggy jeans... and for girls - I hate bootcut jeans with running shoes. Yuck.


However, it is hard to find skinny jeans that actually fit and flatter, so...

Anonymous said...

Yeah, jeans and running shoes should never go together... have you ever run in jeans?! It's a horrible experience. People definitely need to back off on that one. I don't care how "active" you are, no one need to wear any kind of sports shoe with jeans... not practical.

Skinny jeans on the other hand are very very practical. The problem is fat people try to wear them all the time. But on skinny people they look fine.

ps. That rihanna song has been used in enough horrible and cliche ways... and your girlfriend (nor any other human being) should ever attempt to use it in a normal setting. anywhere. ever.

pps. also no one has used the word poser since 2004. bravo.

Anonymous said...

Skinny jeans are exactly the same "fuck you" to the establishment today as in the Johnny Rotten era. You think Punk Rock invented tight pants? Ask Napoleon about that. It was cool in the first wave punk era because the current mainstream was flowy colorful bell-bottomed hippy garb. Today's skinny jeans are the same thing, a Fuck you to the boot-cut wearing guy with frosted tips and a tribal tattoo. The big invasion of this rock style into popular fasion can be largely attributed to Hedi Slimane during his time at the Helm of Dior homme. So leave the late 90s behind, we're past all that.
Skinny jeans don't have to be skin tight or uncomfortable, and they certainly don't have to be unflattering; "skinny" justs mean a slim straight cut through the leg that tapers at the ankle. Well done they're very flattering to someone who's in shape. Google images of Carl Barat to see skinny pants executed at British Rockstar levels.
As for guys vs girls in skinny jeans, they're actually better suited for guys. Skinnies exaggerate your waist and hips - it makes the buttless guy look like he has an ass, but if a girl isn't actually skinny they'll make her legs look like carrots, but since men are more rectangular this isn't such an issue

Anonymous said...

I just want to remind everybody that some guy by the name of Keith Richards was already wearing skinny jeans in the early 60's :)) and as no other band is more "classic rock" than the Stones, skinny jeans was born with classic rock and has a classic rock n roll feel. It's a pity that it is so associated with the punks and emos.
Actually, historically, skinny jeans started with the German greasers (copy of the American greasers) in the late 50's early 60's, and was a male thing before becoming a female staple.

Anonymous said...

Skinny Jeans are the best and they will always be worn by a guy as long as im still alive so Get Over YOURSELF

LaniQue3o said...

FUCK U DUMB ASS


I STILL PULL BITCHS IN SKINNYS LIKE THAT

Anonymous said...

lovely, i just brought even more fresh emo backgrounds 4 my blog
http://www.emo-backgrounds.info

Anonymous said...

Genial dispatch and this mail helped me alot in my college assignement. Say thank you you for your information.

Anonymous said...

Hello All,

i have been trying to figure out a good place to start with the Acai Berry free trial & was just wondering if someone had some thoughts on whether or not it works for weight loss? So far here's the 1 [url=http://acaiberries.zoomblog.com/]article[/url] I've been able to come across that seemed realistic for the goals I have. Thoughts?

Eric said...

That's hilarious. I don't understand the trend either. Why do boys insist on wearing lime green and hot pink skinny jeans? They look silly.

Skinny Jeans for Men said...

It is great to read some of the information and feedback, here. I hope to read more ideas in the future!!!

George Archer said...

I know skinny jeans are looking quite awkward on men. But I have read about some tips on web in which I have found that how should a men choose the skinny jeans that gives him a good look. You must read about such on web.

Jeans Online

Anonymous said...

Greetings from Idaho! I'm bored to tears at work so I decided to check out your site on my iphone during lunch break. I really like the info you present here and can't
wait to take a look when I get home. I'm surprised at how fast your blog loaded on my phone .. I'm not even using
WIFI, just 3G .. Anyways, superb blog!

Also visit my blog post: taucherbrille mit stärke

Anonymous said...

It's not my first time to visit this site, i am browsing this web page dailly and take fastidious information from here daily.

Feel free to surf to my web-site mp3 player line in

Van Heusen said...

Perfect combination of jeans tee looks really stylish and fanatastic too.i like this kind of dressing s much
Van Heusen Jeans http://www.trendin.com/vanheusen/mens-jeans-8

ahmad raza said...

Very informative

In present time jeans are the most popular menswear. Now you can easily choose latest or trendy jeans for men online anytime anywhere at very affordable price with various exciting offers and deals.